Archive for fathers day

Husband signs a “You Can whip my ass” contract with his wife

original article in >> Telegraph U.K. <<  …My commentary is written in  BOLD ITALICS

"It smells like egg foo yung in this suit"

The 32-year-old man, who was named by the Chongqing Evening News as Mr Zhang, took the unusual step after suffering intense abuse from his wife, who studies kung fu. < see..his first mistake was marrying some ole Kill Bill ass bitch.


"Me fuck you up looong time"

“I don’t want to beat him, but arguments are inevitable and I can’t help myself,” his wife told the newspaper. She added that in the week before they signed the deal, she had beaten him up three times.

Rule #1 Never marry a chick that can kick your ass. Haven’t  you bootlegged seen NORBIT fool?

Mr Zhang said his wife, who is a sales manager at a trading company, had studied kung fu since her childhood and that he was attracted to her “strong and independent temperament”.

" I will whip yo lil ching chong ass"

Yeah?…Rasputia had a strong ass temperament too. I bet you didn’t know that temperament came with a strong ass butterfly kick

He also admitted that he had suffered at her hands throughout their six-month courtship. “Before we got married, she had a wild hairstyle and I teased that it made her look like a tigress. #Rule 2 NEVER EVER EVER be fool enough to criticize a woman’s hair. You kinda needed your ass whipped for that one.During the argument that followed, I said some bad words and I got a taste of her kung fu for the first time.” <aaaand probably a taste of you own blood.>

He said that he had tried to bite his lip in order to avoid being punished, but that he “never wants to lose an argument” and so always ends up with “bruises and scars all over”. < see theeere’s ya problem dumb ass. Men..just like women…need to know when to shut the fuck up.

In order to curb his wife’s aggression, Mr Zhang proposed signing a contract in front of his in-laws. If his wife breaches the contract, she has to return to her parents’ home for three days. “She is very obedient to her parents, and her parents will support me and blame her,” he said. “Bitch…hit me again and I’mma tell yo momma?” Dude ur shittin me right? You’re such a loose spined pussy that you actually had a contract drawn up to keep your wife off your ass? Couldn’t just fight back huh? or even better…leave?  What a jackass.

His wife said that she always feels regret when she sees her husband with a black eye. “Now that we have a contract, I will force myself to drop the use of force,” she said. <This broad really needs some fucking anger management.

Mr Zhang’s parents told the newspaper that although they felt bad that their son was regularly attacked, the couple were a good match. “They have a good marriage, so we can say nothing about it,” said his father. < That’s because she probably whipped yall ass’ too. They sound a lil traumatized to me.

I mean damn…we’ve all done some silly shit in the name of love…but contractual ass whippings? I’d rather spend my days reading People magazine to a room full of cats.

12 year old boy to get sex change

PD*26689424

Kim Petras (16) worlds youngest Transexual

A BOY aged 12 turned up at school as a GIRL – after changing sex during the summer holidays.

Teachers called an emergency assembly to order fellow pupils to treat him as female.

The lad, whose parents have changed his name to a girl’s by deed poll, arrived in a dress with long hair in ribboned pigtails. He is preparing for sex-swap surgery.

Angry parents told yesterday how their kids were left tearful and confused after school staff announced the boy pupil was now a girl.

They said the head teacher should have informed them in advance of the “sex change” so they could prepare their sons and daughters and inform them about gender issues.

They added that the school’s failure to do so had left the boy to suffer cruel taunts and bullying.<source>

Uh..bullying? u fuckin think? I think the parents are waaay off base here. Fuck the fact that they weren’t told in an adequate amount of time. how about the fact there is something that had to be told to begin with. Why is this little fruit being allowed to come to school as a girl? That’s complete and utter bullshit. Don’t give me that  shit about sexual discrimination either,because this isn’t about his sexual inclinations.It has more to do with the fact that teenagers are fuckin ASSHOLES period. So for Mike to leave school and come back as Michelle is nothing short of an epic distraction. You want your kid to have a fuckin sexual re assignment okey dokey ..but you also have to get your kid home schooled. People who have gone through this say they don’t wanna be singled out. However…you require separate facilities in most cases thus leaving you open TO BE singled out. It has to be mad uncomfortable feeling like you’re a man in a womans body or vice versa, but is it fair to the majority to subject them to an uncomfortable situation? Your kid can smoke all the pickles he wants AT HOME…he wanna dress like little orphan annie..ok..AT HOME..now..once he has his “sex change” then fine..come to school as Michelle..but there is no “half way” house for those who are in the process of sexual reassignment. IMOH those accommodations have to be made by the individual.